james madison was the fourth president of the united states. he was one of the framers of the constitution. he had a sexy wife named dolley. he was 5'4" and 100lbs., and he owned slaves. five-feet four inches tall, one-hundred pounds ...and he owned slaves. those must have been the happiest slaves that ever lived. "did you slop the hogs this morning, boy." "nope. slept in." "why i've got a good mind to take my whip to your backside!" "sure. go nuts. i'm going to go have a nap ...on the top bunk. do your worst." "harumpf!"