as a society, it seems like the united states is inching ever closer to equal rights for everyone. lots of groups could make a pretty solid case that they are being treated horribly, but the one thing that seems to always calm those gripes is "it used to be worse." which is seemingly true in almost all cases. things did used to be worse across the board. you have to break some eggs to make an omelet, and then it turns out - no one's really that fired up about omelets. one group that can say things used to be quite a bit better would be the effeminate straight man. it's not like they have a group, or meetings, or any sort of coalition. they may not even know that they are a 'people' - but as a group, things have only gotten worse for them. several decades ago they would just be whispered about behind their friends' backs. "old phillip sure likes ironing his pants, doesn't he?" "boy, old phillip can sure sing and dance ...better than the gals even." and so on. old phillip may have gotten some weird looks, but when he went home to his wife, they all just shook their heads. "never woulda guessed old phillip likes crammin' into a lady ...god bless him." but now, because being gay is becoming increasingly more accepted, effeminate straight men are subjected to the "you can tell me" talk. and that can't be comfortable for anyone. "phillip, listen, i'm your friend. and if you have something you want to tell me ...you can. if you're gay - it's ok." and the friend gets to feel like they are enlightened and progressive - but they didn't take into account that no one who is straight likes regularly being called gay ...and vice versa (not many gay fellas like being high-fived, "let's get some pussy! ...it's the equivalent of that, basically). "i'm your friend. you can just tell me." "dude! i just like karaoke and bette midler. can we just have one night where you don't try to pry me out of a closet i was never in?" so, maybe everyone is better off just continuing to whisper behind the phillips of the world's backs. "he's a little light in the loafers, isn't he?" and then just move on.